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Hard Out Here: For a Bitch, From a Bitch

14 Nov

I want to start of by saying I love Lily Allen.

The Fear-great song. 22- Amazing. Smile- also one of my favorites.  The first time I heard her new song/watched the video for “Hard Out Here” I was confused – I actually almost even got a little mad a Lily. But then I realized- Holy shit, she is a fucking genius.

Verse 2 says it all:

If you’re not a size six
Then you’re not good-looking
Well, you better be rich
Or be real good at cooking
You should probably lose some weight
‘Cause we can’t see your bones
You should probably fix your face
Or you’ll end up on your own
Don’t you want to have somebody who objectifies you?
Have you thought about your butt, who’s gonna tear it in two?
We’ve never had it so good, uh huh
We’re out of the woods
And if you can’t detect the sarcasm
You’ve misunderstood

The lyrics are good…the verses, really really speak the unfortunate truth of what it is to be a woman (especially being a woman in the entertainment industry). 

People are questioning her reasons behind hiring the dancers she did, and this was her response:

“The video is meant to be a lighthearted satirical video that deals with objectification of women within modern pop culture,” she wrote. “It has nothing to do with race, at all.” She said that she tried for weeks to get her own twerk moves down but couldn’t get it right, and so hired the best dancers for the job; and that the reason she was more clothed was insecurity about her figure (reminding fans that she did have two children recently).

“I’m not going to apologise because I think that would imply that I’m guilty of something, but I promise you this, in no way do I feel superior to anyone, except paedophiles, rapists murderers etc., and I would not only be surprised but deeply saddened if I thought anyone came away from that video feeling taken advantage of, or compromised in any way,” she wrote, before concluding with an invitation to “Ask the ladies yourselves @shalaeuroasia @monique_Lawz @ceodancers @TempleArtist @SelizaShowtime @melycrisp.” – LA Times

In conclusion, from one bitch to another, way to go Lily. It is indeed Hard Out Here.

PS: I hope I look that good after I have kids.

 

An Open Letter to People Hating On Robyn Lawley

11 Nov

Dear haters,

Please stop being miserable human beings and stop picking on an amazing woman just because she doesn’t have a o-ROBYN-LAWLEY-570-1“thigh gap”. Being a model doesn’t always mean being a size 2 and being beautiful doesn’t always mean having to starve yourself. If this is the way you think, there is clearly something wrong with you and your self -esteem, so stop trying to ruin other people’s lives and reputations.

Stop saying that her body is too “hefty” or  “pig-like”, because chances are you are just some scumbag behind a computer screen who wouldn’t be able to handle himself around a woman like Robyn or any woman for that matter.

But enough of that before someone flags my blog for profanity.

“Food isn’t the problem, it’s society…”

Thank you, Robyn – for saying on national TV what I’ve been saying for years. Plus size modeling should just be MODELING.

Everyone please listen to what she has to say – maybe we can change the fashion/media world after all. Robyn Lawley gives me hope.

Wasting My Youth, C’est La Vie

3 Nov

There are a lot of things that my mother has been right about over the course of my teenage years. Now, a month short from turning 21 years old, I am beginning to question if this is one of them.

I would love to argue with her and tell her that she is wrong. Tell her that age is just a number and that he loves me. But honestly? I’m over that. I’m over telling her she’s wrong, even though I want her to be wrong so badly.

I am currently dating a man who is seventeen years older than me. He is divorced and has two lovely daughters, ages 13 and 9, whom I have come to care about very much, yes, I can even say I love them. We have been together for almost two years. In those two years, I have grown to love him, love him more than I thought I could ever love someone. As a person, as a friend, as a lover, I just love all of him. We connect in a way that leaves me at a loss for words,(which is a rare occurrence for someone like me). We even spoke about  getting married sometime in the future, and even though I didn’t let him know it then, just the idea of spending the rest of my life with him has motivated me more to finish school and get my career in motion.

After having lived with him for about a year, and recently moving back to my parents’ house about a month ago, it would be a stretch to say that we have had a “normal” relationship. However, not being “normal” doesn’t necessarily mean that we haven’t been happy. Or so I thought.

On average, he sees his girls about once a month, twice if he’s lucky. Recently they’ve been asking to see more of him but it’s hard because of time, money and the distance between their house and his. With good reason, my boyfriend is terribly upset by this and for two days now, has only answered one of my phone calls and one of my text messages.

At the risk of sounding selfish, I am angry that he is not answering my attempts to contact him because I need him too. I know that he’s having a hard time, and I really wish I could help him, but part of being in a relationship means that we can rely on each other. Be each other’s rock.

Moving back to my parents’ house has been really hard on me. Crying every night when I try to go to sleep without him, crying every morning when I don’t see him next to me. And let’s not forget, crying every time I go to his house and I have to leave. He has never not listened to my bitching, but this month has been particularly difficult for both of us. I feel alone, lost, and now, questioning how or if this is all going to work out.

While the relationship has brought me lots of happiness, it has been a constant struggle between my head and my heart. It could be that I am looking too far ahead, or maybe that I was never looking far enough ahead. At the moment I feel stuck, or really too pressured to fast forward through my twenties to make someone else happy. I’ve often thought about my future and there are many things I have always thought of doing before settling down with someone. Travel, graduate, make a lot of stupid mistakes that I can tell my kids about in the future (haha), and hopefully make money before I decide to even have a family.

My mom says that I am wasting my youth by dating an older man who already has the responsibility of children. She says I have to “find myself” and “live”. And for a long time I’ve been telling myself that I am “living” the way I want to, but today as I wait for my boyfriend to answer my phone calls I realize he’s already “lived” and has his reason for living; his girls.

Though I cannot blame either of them for wanting what is best for their children, I do want to know where this leaves me.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

I wrote the above about a year ago while I was in a very serious relationship that may not have been ready for at the time. I had originally titled this post “Wasting My Youth”, but now that I look back on it, I don’t know if I was. After all, it was not a bad relationship. I learned a lot, laughed a lot, and most of all LOVED a lot. The problem was that I questioned the relationship too much and if you can’t trust yourself to know what’s right, that’s enough to drive you insane.

The right decisions aren’t always the easy ones. C’est la vie.

DANCE STUDIO HOLDS MODELING WORKHOP TO ENCOURANGE HEALTHY BODY IMAGE

28 Oct

DANCE STUDIO HOLDS MODELING WORKSHOP TO  ENCOURAGE HEALTHY BODY IMAGE

 

Professional dancer and model, Karla Garcia, owner of Sol Dance Center in Astoria, Queens is holding a modeling workshop for teen girls and women in order to promote and encourage healthy body image. This workshop, the “Solettes Modeling Academy”, will stress the importance of feeling confident with one’s body as well as being healthy rather than fitting the size 2 model “look”.

 

This workshop is a 4-week intensive program in which the students will learn how to walk the runway, pose for pictures, explore their look, build their character and more. The workshop will culminate with a professionally done photoshoot so that the students can take home what they learned during their time at Sol.

 

“No one should feel like they have to look a certain way,”  says Karla. “Feel free, love yourself!”

 

The workshop is affordable and for women of all ages. Come join Karla and the rest of her team starting Sunday, November 10th at 2PM for this wonderful opportunity to express yourself through modeling. For more information and to reserve your spot, call Sol Dance Center at (347) 935-3955 or drop by anytime at 30-16 Steinway Street, Astoria, NY 11103.

Here is a clip of Karla modeling/dancing – Hope y’all enjoy and take time to spread the word about  this amazing event! 

 

Press Contact:

Ashley Kervabon

email: awriterkervabon@gmail.com

cell: (347) 684-1489

Who Am I?

24 Apr

For my publishing class we had to write at least 500 words answering the question “Who Am I?”. I reacted to this assignment like any other 20-something-year-old girl would, “…F***! Who the f*** am I?!” But after finishing this assignment, I realized why my professor was making us write this. Read on…

My name is Ashley Kervabon, and I am one half of the indie rock duo that calls themselves “Pretty in Blue”.

Music is and always has been my passion. For a while I gave up on it because many people discouraged me by saying it was not a “stable” career choice, whatever that means. It wasn’t until recently that another girl and I began to exchange song lyrics and rough demos of what we had written in the past when it occurred to us that we should partner up and see what comes of this team. This is how Pretty in Blue was started.

We have been working on original songs and covers since November, and thankfully we’ve been doing pretty well. We have about 14 originals and 4 covers ready to go. Pretty in Blue did their first open mic in January at Paddy Reilly’s Music Bar and has been asked to return almost every weekend since . After the first month of just playing at Paddy’s, I realized we should probably start booking our own shows, and so my PR experience (with some added charm) was able to book us gigs at places like The Bitter End (which is next Tuesday, the 30th at 7:30pm).

While I would love to tell myself that I could settle for a PR job with a decent salary, I don’t think that’s quite the case for me. As crazy and shady as the music business is, I want to be a part of it. I often daydream about hosting SNL with my bandmate and signing autographs. I sometimes plan out my answers to questions I think that Ellen would ask me if I were ever to be on her show. And last but not least, I also recently made a list of what I would name our line of “Pretty in Blue” fragrances.

At this point in my life, I’m just doing what I have to to get by. I’m in school, not because I want to be a doctor, or a lawyer, but because I need a degree so that I don’t end up waiting tables for the rest of my life like so many other aspiring artists out there.

Truthfully, I’d like to think of myself as a lot of things; a lover, a friend, a writer, a rockstar. But who am I really? A 21-year-old girl with a shit ton of dreams (and absolutely no money).

The New Dove Campaign Video #RealBeauty

16 Apr

Watch the video below. What’s the first thing that comes to mind?

Being honest, the first thing I said to myself was “I wonder what my sketches would look like.”
And as I was watching the video I said “Oh…yeah…my face is also rounder and fat…I don’t really have a nice thin chin though…”
But I’m okay with that. At this risk of sounding cliché, I’ve learned to love my body, how chubby my cheeks are, etc. And I do agree with what they say in the video…Whether you embrace your natural beauty or not, shows in your personality. When you walk into a room, people feel that kind of energy – “it is critical to your happiness”.
I’d like to say that I am an extremely confident woman. I’m not conceited, I just know what I can and cannot do well. I don’t spend time dwelling over the things I don’t like about myself and instead embrace the qualities I do like. And I’d like to think that that’s why people are attracted to me. By that I don’t just mean sexually, but in every way, whether it comes to jobs, friends or family.
So I guess I know what my sketches would look like. They’d be identical because I think I see myself the way everyone else sees me. I don’t put on a “happy mask’ for people. But as this video shows, that isn’t the case for everyone.
While this video was empowering for some, it just made me sad. It worries me that more and more women don’t realize the power of their natural beauty or how important it is to know who you are and along with knowing who you are, being happy with who you are.
Hopefully by watching this video other people with realize the importance of this too.
Dove just got a shit ton of brownie points in my book. #realbeauty

Guns and Children Should Never Be in the Same Sentence

16 Dec

As soon as I read about the CT shooting, I told myself I should hold myself back from commenting because although I love to start controversy, when it comes to guns and children, I happen to be very sensitive.

What changed my mind?  This article.

A story about a woman, Liza Long, who has a child with a mental illness who often threatens to kill her and himself.  One day he pulls a knife, the next day he threatens to jump out of  a moving car, and when she’s lucky, he only resorts to calling her a “stupid bitch”.

I try not to say anything on topics I don’t know much about. In this case, America’s gun policy. Which is why I am not writing about why guns are bad, or if we should be able to carry them because honestly I do not know. What I do know is that what we should be talking about is mental health. Especially the mental health of children and teens.

I have read too many comments about taking away guns and not enough about taking care of our children. And though I may not have children yet, I can only imagine what mothers like Liza Long are going through. How awful it must be to call the cops on your preteen son because you have no other option. How awful it must be to hear him say the words “I hate you” when you are just trying to help.

Adam Lanza (CT gunman) was only reported to have autism, which is not a mental health disorder, it is a neurodevelopmental  disorder – it could be that he felt some sort of prejudice because of his learning disabilities. But who knows? And now we’ll never know after his life was lost along with so many innocent children.

Now more than ever, with 1 in 88 being diagnosed, children with autism may face more prejudice and understanding than ever because of the CT shooting.

It is sad that it takes such a tragedy to realize the problems in this country.  And while I’m not sure if guns are the problem, I am positive there is more that we can do to help children and teens with mental illnesses.

Bad Bitches and Ladies, by Vanessa Rene

21 Oct

Lupe Fiasco has, for a while now, been one of my favorite rappers. I’ve loved his impressive wordplay and his clever lyrics, his amazing storytelling and sick flow. And for a little bit, I considered myself a Lupe stan. He could do no wrong in my eyes. Food & Liquor is a masterpiece. The Cool is probably my favorite album of all time. I pretend that Lasers (an album that was released, ultimately to appease his record label…he distances himself from that record every chance he gets…) never happened. And I, like the rest of the Lupe stans out there, anxiously waited for the announcement of when he would be releasing his next album,Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album.

I came across the lead single from the new release off his Facebook page.

The song, “Bitch Bad” is definitely a conversation starter: Lupe tells the story of how two young individuals define the phrase “bad bitch.” A young man heard his mother use it while rapping along to a song. He loves his mother; she takes care of him, and raises him well, so he associates “bad bitch” with women who are like his mother.

A young woman comes across the phrase while watching uncensored rap videos online without parental supervision. To her, being a “bad bitch” is to be like the women seen in those ‘raunchy’ rap music videos: they’re beautiful women who have caught the attention of powerful men in the music industry. She sees the video vixens as role models because of all they were able to achieve, and begins to call herself a “bad bitch,” in hopes of aspiring to their success.

The two eventually meet, and don’t particularly hit it off. They both have two different meanings of the phrase.

The chorus is where the cognitive dissonance starts for me. I can’t enjoy the song as much as I’d like to, nor can I hop onto the message that Lupe attempts to expose because he raps:

“ ‘Bitch’ bad, ‘woman’ good
‘Lady’ better, they misunderstood…”

And in the last verse, he even goes so far as to say, “…greatest: ‘motherhood’.”

While the discourse could be interesting (I can identify with his praise of motherhood, while still acknowledging how problematic it is to suggest that all women aspire to become mothers), especially considering the political climate with regards to Black womanhood, his assertion goes hand in hand with the larger “virgin-whore” dichotomy that is so pervasive in our society. Black women are particularly under such scrutiny.

Continue reading

A Little Segway for GreenEyedJupiter

20 Oct

Hey readers!

It’s nice to be back after a well-needed break. I have some pretty exciting news and some great posts coming up very very soon (from some new writers as well)!

But now I would like to talk about something pretty unrelated to everything we stand for at GreenEyedJupiter.

As some of you may know, this blog was named after my kitty, Jupiter. Well now, Jupiter happens have his own blog, and just released his very first music video. I hope that as my long time readers you can support my cat and follow him on his journey to potential fame.

Please share re-blog this, tweet it, share it, etc. We really appreciate our fans!

So here it is, after this post – back to business.

#PopStarsDoEat #ThatsOkay

23 Sep

It’s bad enough that we don’t leave Lindsey and Amanda alone, but now we’re shitting on Gaga? 

For real? 

So what if she put on a couple of pounds? It really isn’t anyone’s business except hers. First she was too skinny, and people would make remarks about her tweets “#PopStarsDontEat”. Now all we’re hearing is that she’s been eating too many cheeseburgers. 

According to an article on Jezebel, she said this about six months ago: 

“I used to throw up all the time in high school. So I’m not that confident,” said Gaga. “I wanted to be a skinny little ballerina but I was a voluptuous little Italian girl whose dad had meatballs on the table every night.”

She also admitted:

“Weight is still a struggle,” she said. “Every video I’m in, every magazine cover, they stretch you — they make you perfect. It’s not real life … I’m gonna say this about girls: The dieting wars have got to stop. Everyone just knock it off. Because at the end of the day, it’s affecting kids your age. And it’s making girls sick.”

I used to think she was a little crazy. I’m not going to lie about that but now I really feel bad for her. 

Especially since she is right. No celebrity or normal woman/teenage girl should have to go through that kind of pressure. And I’m really glad that another celebrity is taking a stand.