Reflections and Waterfalls

19 Feb

For a long time I pictured my future as follows: go to college, move out, go to some more college, become a psychologist, end up working in a school as a guidance counselor, meet some nice teacher man, get married, have babies and maybe a puppy.

Which for the record, would have been a fine future, but I think the one that is in my path now might be a little brighter.

I would have never imagined myself becoming a writer. It was always something I was passionate about but I can’t say I ever saw it as a career choice. I must have about fifty journals from when I was 13 to about 17 at my parents house. When my mom asked me to throw them out when I was moving I considered it to be the worst insult anyone has ever thrown at me. It just didn’t make sense.

I explained to her that those notebooks contained half of my childhood. What I said, what I didn’t say, what I wish I could have said…all things that would probably be either depressing or hilarious to read now. Regardless, she still did not understand why I wanted to keep those notebooks. This is when I realized that writing was more important to me than most people.

A few weeks ago I started to think about what I wanted to do after I graduated college. I decided on that I really want is to work for a magazine like Cosmo or Seventeen, or maybe one day I could even start my own publication. For the first time ever today I walked into the Hearst Corporations building in Manhattan. This is the building in which the Cosmo and Seventeen offices are located. The first thing you see when you walk in is a waterfall. Yes, a big fucking waterfall. I sat there in front of it for a bit and reflected on the past few months of my life. I’ve done pretty well for myself, I thought. I have a part-time gig that I actually like. I live with my boyfriend, we have a cat, and well, that is pretty awesome. School is school (enough said) ,but come summertime I’ll be one step closer to having an actual career (that being my ultimate goal).

This waterfall opened some doors for me. It made me realize that no matter how much shit I have to put up with now (not sleeping, never having free time, etc.) , NOT TO SOUND CLICHE, but it will all pay off when I wake up in the morning to be greeted by this same waterfall. I no longer WANT to work there. I need to.


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